There is a riddle I discovered
‘Tis very tricky
You will see
Before we get started
Let us make a pact
As I prepare to present you
My opinionated facts
There is one rule of thumb
You, however, must follow
The only clue I will offer
You cannot be shallow
Politely you ask
I proceed, with a please
As you anxiously await my version
Of the birds and of bees
Are you ready?
Well, here goes
Just a little reminder
My friends and my foes
You mustn’t be quick
To disagree
Now again back
To my story
Many myths on masculinity
Feeble fables of femininity
Tall tales of give and take
Stories of controversy
Are at stake
There is cosmic sensuality
Strong women at core are men
There is human sexuality
Great men at core are women
Confused yet?
Please do not be
There is so much more
‘N now for my poem
Of enlightening metaphor
A woman’s mind
Is like the head of a penis
Easily aroused
When stroked with thoughts of genius
A woman’s spirit
Is like that of the shaft
Excitedly approaching climax
As she masters her craft
A woman’s heart
Is like an orgasm
Whose burst of emotive energy
Causes muscles to spasm
A woman’s soul
Is like that of the scrotum
Inhabiting a plethora of semen
With an infinite number of possibilities
A woman’s body
Is like the shrine men call penis
Strong, erect, hard
Smooth pillar of beautiful flesh
Monument to the Love Goddess Venus
Answer to my riddle
What is the nature of a man?
What is the essence of a woman?

Circa 1995

Lady Passion dreams of a place South of France
It is a place with green grass and beautiful trees
In that place she will sing and do her dance
To the Fates she prays on bended knee

In her dreams that place has a Victorian Lake
Thousand of sunflowers and a ranch full of horses
Reality interrupts dreams when Passion awakes
Why that place even has a splendid golf course

At daytime she imagines that glorious land
There is where Passion undoubtedly belongs
Sir Love will court her and take her by the hand
On their lake she will sing to him love songs

Lady Passion’s torch is unable to be extinguished
Sir Love embraces the key to her heart
Twins of beauty, their offspring, they’ll alone distinguish
This family was destined from the very start

Peace abides among those hundreds of acres
Joy fills each room with unending bliss
The land Passion dreams of is a place most sacred
Passion longs for the day her love she does kiss

To date Passion’s dreams are not yet a reality
For currently she abides in a most desolate place
It is a place where there exists many a fatality
Lacking in peace and joy it brings much sadness to her face

Lady Passion toils on with undying fervor
Mister Doubt likes to cause Passion much fear
She has vowed she shall be more than mere survivor
For someday she’ll live tranquilly year-after-year

Songs of birds may be heard in the early morning air
Calm and serenity fill the atmosphere there with still
With her family she longs for that place to share
The mere thought of it brings to her heart a thrill

One day from this morbid plain she will leave
In that other place she will find her greatest romance
Behind she will leave all her tragedy and grief
Passion longs for that place in the Isle de France

Circa 1995

There once was an Empress
who issued a herald throughout the land
Countless letters, various telegrams
and bulletins did she wire
This Empress sought
Neither a dull nor ordinary man
Only someone strong and wise
Did the Great Empress desire
Her day-to-day lifestyle
Was quite an immense task
For she happened to be
The ruler of an Imperial Empire
The strategy she concocted
Was to disguise her identity by mask
While she searched for the consort
She longed to acquire
The Empress required that he love her
In spite of her throne
If all the tests were passed
Then this matter would end in bliss
The Empress also needed
The consort be solely for her alone
Empress Loveless longingly awaited
Her dream lover’s passionate kiss
One fine morning found the Empress
Bathing in the randy terrace
Desperation was beginning
To cause hope to fail her intent
Suddenly from out of nowhere
Don Juan offered to fondle a caress
And so off into the royal chambers
She sent her desire alone to foment
It was not her beauty alone,
He said, which did captivate
There was something alluring
About her wise and gentle spirit
Handsome Don Juan proclaimed their meeting
An arrangement by fate
Solemnly he vowed to prove
That he was a man of merit
After a time went by
The Empress became a bit despairing
For by all means she needed
To be sure this man was true
Like the petals of a rose
Her heart slowly began budding
In her distressed state she exclaimed,
“Oh, whatever shall I do?”
There existed no possibility
For her to wed a mere commoner
This Empress had a great
And vast empire to uphold
Could it be that the two
Shared a common denominator
It was Lady Destiny who caused
Their enormous love to unfold
The man for her must surely
Be more than merely magnate
She also needed substance
And a vast array of qualities
However, with Don Juan,
The Empress began nightly to copulate
“My, my,” said the Empress,
“I am beginning to see the possibilities.”
Alas, with her lover,
She was imperiously direct
After all, the man for her
Need be much more than a Romeo
He is also the man whose mere presence
Could command her respect
“Beautiful Empress, proclaimed her lover,
"It is I, Majordomo.”

Circa 1995